Postcards from the Funny Farm

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So much can be said about the way our minds scientifically bend around electronic mail. Email is impersonal. It is interpreted largely by the receiver and is not determined by the intent of the writer. I know this from personal experience on both ends. I have written emails that people reacted defensively to and I have read emails that made me virtually paranoid! Most of this negative stuff is unnecessary and not intended, that’s why I try to email as little as possible. I prefer to call someone or visit them if I have something important to say. Words on the screen can be taken wrong … it happens every day. If you think people will “get” your email 100%, you are misled. You are better off talking about serious things in person. When you do email though, I recommend making it complimentary and terse. Even if you think you have the perfect novel to email someone, remember you are going to wait in limbo until you hear back … and that is often a lot longer than what is comfortable.

With no inflection of voice or hand gestures, emails fall short of face to face communication. If you have something to share with someone, bear in mind your point might be better made in a medium other than email. It has its place in human affairs but I think our world is only just beginning to understand it.

Are you a homeowner? If so, you know how long it can take to get the furniture you want in your home. This can be due to limited finances, spare-time, or knowledge of where to buy the stuff you need. My family just purchased it’s first home mortgage so we can relate with furniture envy big time. In our house, we are getting all new stuff as we go but most specifically, we are looking for bar stools.

I ran across a website that specializes in bar stools and they have some really competitive prices when you buy of the internet. For us, waiting for UPS to deliver our barstools is a heck of a lot better than traveling into town only to haggle a price with those insistent salespeople. At (link) there are wooden, metal, wrought iron, and every barstool conceivable there. The pictures are sharp and you can enlarge them to get a better view than if you were right there.

We all know these days you should check a company out before using them. This website is approved by the Better Business Bureau which, for me, was a huge incentive to try them. If you have bar stool envy, get it satisfied online. When they get into your home, your new Bar Stools will thank you!

Folks, I have been to the mountain and it is ColdPlay’s new single … Maybe it will be like cotton candy and I’ll be sick of it soon but it is on infinite repeat for now in my Windows Media Player. Give it a listen/read and see if I lie. So, if you are wondering how it relates to psychology and inspiration? Music can bring out psychology and memory we’ve forgotten for years, as well as new inspiration. Music has everything to do with the senses and memory and love and well therapy … but who really cares about “niches” when you’re in love with a new song?  Your thoughts? Interpretations?  As for me, I have been owned.

Streaming Link: Viva la Vida

Verse 1:
I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemies’ eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing
“Now the old king is dead, long live the king!”
One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castle stands
Upon pillars of salt, and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells a’ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can’t explain
Once you’d gone it was never,
never an honest word
That was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People couldn’t believe what I’d become
Revolutionaries wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh…who would ever wanna be king

I hear Jerusalem bells were ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs were singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can’t explain
I know St. Peter won’t call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

Bridge:
Whoaaa (x4)

Bridge and Chorus mix:
(Whoa…) Here Jerusalem bells were ringing
(Whoa…) Roman Cavalry choirs were singing
(Whoa…) Be my mirror, my sword and shield
(Whoa…) My missionaries in a foreign field
(Whoa…) For some reason I can’t explain
(Whoa…) I know St. Peter won’t call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

Oooh Ooooh Oooh Ooooh… (until fade)

Today’s fast paced world leaves us all exhausted at the end of most days. Right now, as an example, I have that woozy feeling I have forgotten an appointment because I didn’t transfer it from my wallet to my Yahoo! calendar. Oh well, if I did I did. I’m pretty good about that usually. Anyway, with life being so fast, as Randy Pausch reminded us all, I think it’s really important to have some therapeutic reverie once in a while. I talk about W.I.N. with my team at work and sometimes, reverie needs to be “what is important now.” One day it may be getting your kid immunized, another it might be to buy pet supplies.

Looking back at life’s seasons and grand events helps us move forward more bravely. When we can see our bio as separate from our now it makes us seem greater than we are, or at least more able. I recommend listing your accomplishments by decades but if you are in your twenties or younger, that’s not much of a filing system. Separate your life into sections you find relevant, but try and do it when you can steal away for some quiet time. You can draw mantras from these for the upcoming year (ie; “I carried my running team by gaining 4 points in the finals”)

Here’s a portion of mine as an example:

Decade 0-10

• I was put into the gifted and talented education program in 2nd grade.
• I wrote “Swimmy the Turtle” and won 2nd place in the state fair in 3rd grade.
• more

Decade 11-20

• I learned every guitar riff The Alarm recorded.
• I got my first job as a printer’s apprentice.
• I trained as a camp counselor and counseled on summer.

Decade 21-30

• I met and recorded with my rock hero Dave Sharp of the Alarm.
• I got a job teaching at 27 in an inner-city school.
• I got my Master’s Degree at age 28.

Decade 31-39

• I got married at 33.
• by 38 I had my third kid and decided that was plenty ;)
• I bought my first mortgaged home at 39 and it has a pool!

If you try it, have fun with it. I suppose if you’re a blogger you might want to consider it like a meme. Please do! Everyone else, just thank goodness you aren’t self-absorbed as we bloggers and do it on a notepad and save to your desktop. It’s therapeutic and an absolute recommendation from me. Can you say “absolute recommendation?” Hmmm. Ok well, regardless, I recommend doing it. Life is good, but it will pass you by if you don’t stop once in a while.

Do you remember the first time you got an auto loan? I sure do. I wanted that car so bad I was having dreams about it. Unfortunately the thing I wasn’t having was the down-payment or the Auto Financing . Since I was only 19, you can’t really fault me. well, that was in 1989 and boy how times have changed. APEX Auto loan is a site I ran across that can get you approved in under 3 minutes. Whether you are thinking about your first Auto Loan or you’ve had 10 already, this is a great place to see what you can get. Oh and by the way, they also work with Bad Credit Auto Loans if that’s something you would need.

Beware, this post is not your usually “blue-sky” writing Damien. But, I think this post is very important to consider. Maybe the full moon seized my psyche, who knows. Yesterday I wrote a post on how we must give to others even when they can̵.... This is the sign of an evolved mind, a seeker of goodness. As Dale Carnegie pointed out, we are worthless if we can’t do this. have you ever been shocked when someone tried to give you something and you thought there was a “catch” and then you finally found out there wasn’t? I have been in that position and it makes you feel like a real jerk. Our perspective of the world needs to be optimistic and the best way we change this is to do these acts of kindness for others on purpose expecting nothing in return. Like I said yesterday: try it and you will see why I recommend this. It is a way to show unconditional love and release that energy into your world.

But hold on cowboys and cowgirls … when should you hold back? Should you serve everyone the same way? Is showing unconditional love always the best way to happiness?

If you are of the Judeo-Christian worldview, you know what Jesus said and others like him in the old testament. He was asked: “How many times shall I forgive? Seven times?” and he replied in the famous aphorism: “…seventy times seven.” This is a really non-realistic example. If I am to forgive someone perpetually I am just more or less a ding-a-ling and I deserve to get taken advantage of.

If you are not a Christian, you are likely still of the general belief that it is always better to serve other people all the time. For the same reasons, this is faulty thinking and we need to get it straight in our heads if we want to be productive, string people that have the ability to help others at all.

You see there comes a point when we become tired enablers. people around us get used to us doing their work for them and ours suffers. This is a dangerous place. When you become a reckless helper, you can lose sight of the things that are falling apart in your own world. For that reason you need to be very aware of your energy threshold and when you start taking on too much, you need to tell people no without shame. I helped too many people the other day and could barely get my stuff at work done.

Do all that you can do without depleting your energy. For example, if you have to weed your garden and you go over to help your neighbor weed theirs, you may risk not getting your own chores done. If you can help them a little and maybe show them a technique you know this is better. There is a time to stop giving and that is the time when you feel your resources are depleting. If you can’t get your own stuff done, then you have no business helping others for the sake of helping. That’s the time to take a few cruises, or something just for you.

Your answer to that question may be the reason you’re not getting what you want.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

-Dale Carnegie

Of all his quotes, this one is the best in my opinion. It’s like the old adage your mother and father said when you were young: “If you want to have a friend, you have to be a friend.” Ah if it were only so simple to put into practice. Here’s a gem of knowledge I’ve picked up: aspirers to greatness, get out your pens.

When fettered by the pressures of the day, there is a way out. Well, I’ll call it a way through since “way out” connotes quitting. Instead of focusing on your pressures and concerns, tell yourself on the way to work or whatever it is you are doing: “I will try and help others first today.” You will find this to be a transformative experience that will open your mind more to those around you. As a result, you will be more accepting and your troubles will likely become easier to deal with. I wouldn’t recommend this unless I had tried it. And as always, I write it here in part to remind myself to use it. Try thinking of others above yourself tomorrow and see what happens. I think you’ll be pleased and surprised.

Today I had a rough first day back at work. I’m a 4th grade teacher in California and my school just put new carpet in my room. As a result, I had to take every item out of storage and rearrange all my things from the heaviest desks to the minutiae of staples. Tomorrow I have my biggest chore: the walls. I have to hang colored butcher paper and staple them up. It’s a daunting task, if you are a teacher you know.

When it was time to go home I could have gone home to take a nap (which I considered) but I thought taking my wife out to the new sports-bar pizza joint would be more inspiring. It was tasty and they even had a popcorn machines. As I had a few Amber ales and chatted with my wife, my troubles seemed smaller. I looked around and saw the many other people in the evening restaurant air and imagined their problems. Despite them, they were laughing and giving high-fives … I was glad to be with them.

My point of this vignette: get out more. Often when we want to hide from our duties and jobs what we really need is just to put ourselves where the people are. That’s where we find we aren’t any better or worse off than most of them

NOTE: This is not a paid endorsement for Skechers shoes. I just like them a lot ;)

New shoes for a new year, that’s one of my simple pleasures in life. For my one-year-old I’d compare it to new crib bedding (which we just bought for her from a ritzy designer baby place for the new year. Some of your are wondering, “Did he write new year?” Yes, Teachers are kind of like the Chinese that way, we have a weird time we start our years. Usually it’s around August. But back to new shoes being simple pleasures. I haven’t indulged in it for 3 years so this is something special I had to write about!

Sometimes it’s those simple pleasures that give us the fuel we need to do great things. I start back to work teaching in the 2008-2009 school-year tomorrow. My teaching job can be hot and cold but it is always is always an over-brimming source of material for my online diary.

The brand of shoes I bought is “Skechers,” a once small company from Southern California that has now become a household word like Vans or Stride Rite. I don’t know how the name evolved exactly but I remember growing up in the 80’s when surfers in my region would use the term “sketchy” as slang to mean “frightening.” Mostly it was used with regards to big waves ie;

Dude, that giant wave was skecthy.

I guess that’s why I have worn Skechers all these years. They are quality shoes and very comfortable, but it is something about that association with thrill-seeking, with surfing that keeps me buying them. They aren’t cheap at 60 bucks a pop. Still, it’s something we try to budget it in because of its importance to me. I laced mine up tonight and set them at the bottom stair ready for “the waves” that will come tomorrow. Even though I start teaching in the morning, I feel like a kid before his first soccer game.

You may not like the style of Skechers. You may prefer some other specialized “body armor” to wear to work. It is not the brand that makes it better, it’s your excitement. No one may ever notice the type of shoes you wear. If you’re a woman, then maybe no one will have noticed your new bracelet, or power skirt etc. The point is, there is a psychology to new things you assign meaning to that will make you more creative, innovative, and in many ways better.

If you’re facing a rocky climb ahead, it might seem more like a brick wall … try some new shoes.

Getting charged with something serious can do a number on your psychology and sap your inspiration to do anything. Thankfully, excellent lawyers are out there for your DUI or criminal defense. You don’t have to go through your struggle alone. Getting back on your feet and on the right track again takes the skill of advanced lawyers who are in the top 5% of lawyers in the L.A. area. Did I mention they are former city prosecutors?

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