Maintain A Passive Attitude

inspiration, psychologyDr. Herbert Benson of Harvard Medical School pioneered the relaxation response, a term he coined in the 1970s. Part of this method is to “maintain a passive attitude.” His method is centered on practice and learned behavior. When you can concentrate on a word, phrase, visual, or body movement, you are able to escape the overpowering worries of the day.

Through this method, theoretically you should be able to move in and out of a relaxed state by using a single item to concentrate on, such as a word or phrase. As I have said before, there is great power in focusing on just one thing at a time. You can actually be more productive in doing so than you would be focusing on more than your stress threshold can handle. I guess I should define that: I mean the threshold between normal physical functioning (ie; blood pressure 120/80 or lower) and abnormal functioning (ie; excessive sweating, breathing problems, discomfort etc.). Let’s examine what a passive attitude sounds like through five sentences. Perhaps you could add a few of your own.

  1. Oh well.
  2. I’m over it.
  3. That’s one way to look at it.
  4. Is that so?
  5. I see.

Now let’s contrast them with some unhealthy, stress inducing responses:

  1. Oh my God, what will I do?
  2. You don’t understand! This is awful.
  3. Are you trying to be a jerk or something?
  4. Well great, I guess I was totally wrong.
  5. Screw you.

Now some may laugh at those, but they aren’t funny. Eckhart Tolle says in his bestselling book The New Earth that “resentment is the result of an illusion we choose to believe.” Isn’t every negative reaction really the result of an illusion we choose to believe in? My wife tells me I am like Winnie the Pooh sometimes when I am overly passive about bills, work, struggles, etc. That may be true because my dad is like that too. However, some of that is my attempt to invoke the relaxation response.

Another way I get into that passive “place” is to imagine myself going under a wave and doing a somersault underwater at the beach. Then I picture myself having an iced tea sitting at commercial furniture like they have at the beach. That is something that relaxes me in real life. Visualizing it during times of trouble or fatigue helps me maintain a passive attitude, but this is visualization which we have already covered. I could also say a term like “wave somersault” repeatedly to summon the same effect. What could be your word or phrase to maintain a passive attitude?

Trackbacks Comments
  • Great tip with the word or phrase suggestion. Some people benefit from the use of a mantra while doing the visualization. Concentrating on repeating the mantra can help tremendously for people who’s minds tend to race, which leads to more stress.

    The passive attitude phrases you listed are interesting. I’m sure there’s people who will more greatly identify with one list or the other. Sometimes, though, saying “screw you” is the best thing you can do depending on circumstances. I don’t say that, I just Catboot people, but same difference :)

    Love this series!

    Jessica The Rock Chicks last blog post..Run Like The Wind

  • Marcia says:

    Wave somersault would stress me! I’d think I was drowning.

    Someone I know says, “It is what it is.” They hated it the first ten times they heard it, but I catch them saying it unconsciously to calm down.

    I don’t know what I do – well, number 5 sort of, the negative 5 depending on the “offense”, or just getting lost in my poetry and putting one foot in front of the other one. I probably go more inward when stressed more personally, but if the stress is something affecting many of us, I am more apt to calm myself by trying to calm them, going outward.

    Ditto Jessica’s last sentence!

    Marcias last blog post..Bah, humbug

  • Chelle says:

    Wow…I am constantly “maintaining a passive attitude” – I must repeat those phrases 100 times a day!…People are always telling me how insanely laid back I am (especially if you compare me to my crazy kids, lol)…maybe this is why?

    Chelles last blog post..Don’t Like Giving Out Your Phone Number? Try Skype.

  • Jaime says:

    I guess I have always carried a passive attitude since I have a passive personality most of the times. I am really calm in trying situations. Some of my family would say I have a nonchalant attitude, like I do not care about what is going on. But now I realize that I carry a passive attitude towards life and situations in my life and I really do care I just have a different way of caring.

  • Damien Riley says:

    @Jaime: You’ll live longer. Keep it up.

Leave a Comment