Postcards from the Funny Farm

I’m half-asleep when I get ready for work.  Some days putting my socks on takes too much effort, so I go sockless … the only problem there is I ruin whatever shoes I’m wearing — to be kind in my relaying of this event, they STINK!  So anyway, after ruining a couple pairs of shoes I’ve learned socks are not optional for me!  So I get them on along with running the razor across my head trying not to get a nick.  All the while I am thinking about how friggin cold it is and how long I can stay in the hot shower without being late for work.  But what was this post about?  Oh yes … coffee … my apologies ;)

I resurrected the Coffee Vocab series today for a couple reasons, 1) I wanted to bring back to your knowledge these past posts I have done in the series (I think they are rather hysterical) and at the same time I wanted to perpetuate a little humor.  I don’t think I have been funny enough around here lately.  Those who know me know I am purposely a humor-filled guy.

When I shop for coffee at the grocery store, I don’t look for the half cut shipping boxes of: Starbucks, Diedrichs, Seattle’s Finest, etc.  You might be surprised to find out I worked in a coffee house nearly 2 years and still have no interest in “high grown ban” that I suggestive sold all that time.  Nah, my best coffee is the cheap stuff.  Surprisingly that is usually Folgers but I have learned lately that “Chock-full-o-Nuts” is quite cheap.  Whatever the cheapest is, I get it.  My wife once told me it worked out to like 13 cents a cup that way whereas Starbucks is, as you know, well over a dollar now.  I put huge amounts in my coffee machine and brew just one cup.  I grab it, start to get awareness back and hop in my Jeep to go to work.

If I get to work and I forgot my coffee, I have supplies there to make one.  1) A Melitta drip top cup cover (hugely cool!!! Esp. in time of need) 2) Paper towel as a filter & 3) Virtually every old coffee cup we own hidden in my teaching cabinet … I really need to bring them all home someday!

“Everbody’s got something to hide, ‘cept for me and my Monkey” -John Lennon

If you get a few minutes, go back and help me revive the other Coffee Vocab posts.  I like to share my humor with the world, and they are far funnier than this one.  What was the high point you think, the stinky shoes? LOL.  Have a great day.

This is a screenshot from my son’s favorite game, Soul Caliber II. Since I promised him an hour just me and him doing stuff once a week in attempt to bond more, this game has become a weekly endeavor. The beast reminds me of the beast of sleepiness attacking me right now: unyielding, ferocious, unmerciful.

I think the worst torture we do to ourselves is sleep deprivation. Why is it so hard sometimes to just lay down and take a nap? When we’re tired it’s hard to stay positive. Usually there are times in the day we can sleep more and we just don’t. And then of course there are the many times it just isn’t possible with all we have to do. Spain and Mexico used to have a siesta in the day when all the stores closed and everyone taking a nap. I love the Hispanic culture, you can read more on that at my Cheese Enchiladas article here. In Soul Caliber II you have to strike the beast down to kill him. In the case of the sleepiness beast, you have to stop and do nothing do defeat him… why is that so hard to do?

Back to what I was saying: The tired feeling when you have things to do but keep nodding off is the single-most brutal beast in my life. It makes me cranky, impatient, grouchy, and uncomfortable. Maybe it’s because I spend too much time working, maybe it’s because I have recently been cutting way back on coffee … whatever the reasons, I’m a tired dude today and I think it’s probably mostly my fault.

I need to face it: It’s not possible to be a possibility thinker when I am too tired to think.  See you on the other side of a much needed nap.

Have you come face to face with the most brutal beast?

There are many more ways, but I was thinking this morning that a process always helps.  Perhaps you can add your own to this list:

1. Wake up on time (alarm clock with a mellow station).
2. Make some good coffee.
3. Have your outfit all picked out the night before (not always possible I know).
4. Train your school-age son(daughter) to make the lunches (LOL).
5. Have a CD picked out with music that inspires you, make sure it is in your car.
6. As you are getting your coffee made and last minute stuff, start your car and turn the heat on full-blast (winter only).
7. As you drive to work, think about the possibilities of the day. Look at struggles and worries as merely “opportunities” to see life a new way and improve yourself.
8. Think about positive things as you listen to your music on the way. Admire the beauty of the desert all around you.
9. Consciously remember to smile at people today, you affect others more than you know.
10. Be ready, for anything … and when anything comes your way, accept it as either a positive or an opportunity.
11. Commit yourself to be 100% in the moment.  This means not worrying about the future or the past.  I have found they both take care of themselves.
12. Create a relevant greeting to use so you don’t get tongue tied in those stressful moments.  When you see someone at work, say: ___________. (examples: Hi, 3 day weekend.  Happy Thursday.  Hang in there,  etc.)
13. Have pictures of your kids on your desk and focus on the reasons you work.
14. Make another CD of your favorite songs and play it in your office area or MP3 player if this is possible in your workspace.  For me, its in my classroom before the kids come in.
15. If you have friends at work that won’t mind, send them a short email letting them know you are thinking of them and that you hope they have a great day.  The replies throughout the day are great to remind you of the same thing.
16. Take time to breathe and do nothing for a few mintes before work.  Meditate, pray, think, be still … etc.
17. If a bunch of stuff has been cluttering somewhere for a while, its probably not crucial.  Put it all out of sight temporarily (a cabinet, a bin, a box etc.).  This will create a clear place in your work area that can help you see possibilities.
18. Structure your day with an agenda by hour and check it off as you go.
19. Say this statement three times out loud when you are alone: “I am fortunate.”
20. Accept that there is something larger than yourself and surrender that you are small in the big scheme of things.  Even if you wanted to be in control of everything, it wouldn’t be possible so be faithful in the small things on your agenda and make it an excellent day.

What do you do to have a good workday?