Postcards from the Funny Farm

Photo by: KitAy
Most people have odd stories of jobs they did in college.  I have more than most I think.  Much much material for my teaching and for my kid’s bedtime stories comes from the years I spent in my early twenties as a Pizza Hut delivery driver.  There is much to share but in this post I want to tell you a story about a can of anchovies and 5 bucks.

In between deliveries on slow nights, the guys and like one girl would hang out in the back trying to appear as if we were cleaning things.  I remember the freaks that worked there.  One guy would always feel the need to tell us about the drugs he was on, not to mention the fact that he had them for sale if anyone was interested.  A real “high brow” group.  Not much for inspiration but bucketloads for funny stories.

Tim bet me I couldn’t eat a can of anchovies and I called his $5 bluff.  I swallowed a whole can of those nasty salty raw fish and stuck my tongue out to the laughter and disgust of the onlookers.  I took my $5 and went on my run quite green I think.  Needless to say I never told the folks who got their pizza that I pulled over to the side of the road and let those fish swim right back out.  God, was I am idiot in those days.  Stay tuned folks, I’ve learned a lot about life from pizza and in this series I hope to share it all!

Damien and Sarah are out buying and moving into a new house and I’ve been honored with a request to guest blog here at Postcards From The Funny Farm.

While Damien is so inspirational and thought provoking, I am so…RANTastic. I’ve tried to find a delicate balance between the two with my thoughts on the differences between houses and homes for my guest post.

What is a house? A house is just a never large enough building with a roof that hopefully doesn’t leak when it rains. There will be some doors that let you walk in and out to go to work every day so you can afford the mortgage payment, property taxes, insurance and everything inside the house that will break the minute you sign the closing papers.

Of course, the house doesn’t come with anything so you will also need a second mortgage and a part-time job to decorate and fill it with beautiful furniture so the kids have a place to spill their grape kool-aid.

It’s true.

So why would anyone want to buy one of these? They wouldn’t. No one wants to buy a house. People want to buy a home.

A home is very different than a house. It’s the place you can kick off your shoes and relax in your favorite comfy chair. It’s the place where your kids, spouse and dogs come running to the door to greet you. It’s where you live, you love and laugh.

Home is where you bring home new babies in baskets and then gradually turn into a basket case when it’s time to let them go. It’s the place where every little stain and hand print has a story that only the people who live there can tell. It’s the place where dinner, poster board homework projects and most importantly, memories are made.

A house is the location listed on a property deed. A home is where your heart is and where you belong.

And like my friend Dorothy says, there’s just no place like it.

Damien and Sarah,

May your walls be filled with laughter,
may it reach from floor to rafter.
May the roof keep out the rain,
may sunshine warm each windowpane.
And may the door be open wide
to let the Good Lord’s love inside.

Congratulations on your new home!

P. S. When the furnace starts making a terrible noise, I know a guy :)