Postcards from the Funny Farm

I’ve been in a situation recently where my physical body/animal brain was moving me to retaliate against someone who offended me (actually a couple people) and at the same time my intellect was telling me to relent, or hold off until I’d calmed down. I won’t get into specifics because that’s not my point here. I’ll tell you I did relent and I am so glad.

Once I calmed down and reassessed the situation, I realized that while my feelings were 100% valid, they were not a good determiner of action. In fact, if my feelings had determined my actions in the professional environment, in this case I could have severed (possibly permanently) networks with key people likely to be in my circle until I retire. When the hot cools down from work days like that, you have some amazing realizations reclining at home or jumping on your trampoline. You have no idea what they will be in the heat of the moment.

So what did I learn from this and why am I sharing? Well, as I have said over and over, I write about psychology and inspiration here in order to better your life. It isn’t therapy for me. If it were you’d read a lot of bad words etc. I am thinking and analyzing my life all the time for good lessons to share with you. I hope these lessons advance you in your journey. That is why I blog on psychology and inspiration. In this post, my lesson is simple: In the professional environment, let facts not feelings determine your actions.

When you feel upset, insulted, or angry, these are usually products of a bruised ego and not the real you (as Eckhart calls the “being”). Relenting when you feel badly can help you recover your sense of being and throw off your ego. So, here are the three things I did when I was offended/mistreated recently at work. Translated into your life, I hope they help you save yourself some grief and advance like I did:

1. Get the facts written down.
2. Write down a note (official in wording) to the offending party(ies) stating the wrong done to you and DONT SEND IT. Put it in your wallet folded tightly closed.
3. Forget about it and go about your day.
4. Later in the evening, pull out the letter. You may be ashamed you wrote it, but keep it for 3 days. If the issue does come up, you will be upset and you can take the note out for the facts that emotion may cause you to forget.

That’s it! As I have said (to the rhythm of something Peter Piper Picked a Peck of Pickled,

I’m no expert on psychology but I have read more on psychology than some psychology experts :)

Now you’ve read some of that yourself, succinctly put in a blog post. At work, be a real man (or woman) and act on facts, not on feelings. Do what you have to do to stay cool. Another thing I do, and I have written on the value of a music CD, is make and listen to a CD of the best tunes I know.

Quick after thought: WATCH OUT! Something is at risk with this kind of talk, and it’s your job! You will be better off to use this approach but remember you should never forget any wrong done to you against the law or your contract. Write it down! All I am saying to do is to deal with it later.